August 19th 2014

sometimes things are weird. life is weird. changes happen and you feel kind of numb. 

it's almost as if right now that the world is happening and my eyes are glazed over like what's going on?

it's so weird, as a songwriter and performer everything i do is based on feeling... and i've always been VERY emotional and right now.. there's something in me that just wants to be quiet. I don't know what it is. 

maybe because I've been so high and so low 

on such a crazy rollercoaster. I've taught myself to just go go go and not pay attention to anything else... 

but i didn't like the person i was becoming. i think it actually scared  me how demanding and weird i was becoming.

i learned how to turn it on... and turn it off. 

sometimes a change in season, a new love, some kind of truth can you lead you back to normalcy... hopefully i'll find it again.

so many people have tried to guide me but i realized i can't be guided.... 

and my muse can't be controlled. :/ 

hope & pray it comes back.